by Michael | Jan 27, 2020 | Blog
When is it too late to say “Happy New Year”?
Most people
give it till the end of January – so that makes this blog post ‘in date’.
We’ve come off the back of lashings of year and decade celebrations and new year resolutions. (I wonder how many resolutions you still have intact?!)
It’s great that New Year’s Eve gives us an excuse for a celebration. Celebrating – chatting, dancing, singing and laughing – is all very healthy (even if excessive eating and alcohol might be less so!). Even simply looking forward to it can do you good.
So a few weeks ago we were looking forward, but maybe we also looked back. Taking stock enables us to realise where you’ve come from – and where we still might need to go.
If you’re at all philosophically-inclined, you’ll understand that present time and reality don’t really exist. The present never stays – it always moves on. There’s only past and future time that we can measure.
What about
marking an event in 2020? Yes, some more celebrating! Perhaps you have a big
anniversary in the offing. Or perhaps you just want an excuse for a celebration.
Either way, you can get another fix by planning a ‘do’.
Why not celebrate a promotion or a happy family event? You might have completed a year’s marriage (that IS quite an achievement). It could be a birthday ending in -5 or -0. Or else, time and circumstances have invalidated your wedding vows and you want to renew them.
You might mark any of these events with a dinner at home, a few drinks down the pub, a hotel gathering or a party by the canal. But have you thought of making it a bit more special? You could also hire a civil celebrant.
You won’t need to worry about any registrars or red tape. You can have the ceremony you can afford or really want. Choose the venue that appeals to you. Let the celebrant add something extra to the proceedings – possibly, gravitas, possibly humour, or a combination. Theceremony can include religious elements (or none). You may invite people of your choice (family or friends) to participate (eg in a ritual, reading a poem or making music). It can be whatever you want it to be. It doesn’t have to be long.
So let
yourself go! Work together with the celebrant and compile the ceremony of your
dreams!
If this has whetted your appetite at all for a unique, personalised ceremony, then have a non-obligation chat with me and let your imagination take flight!
Photo: mckinley_rodgers.com
by Michael | Sep 20, 2018 | Blog
What’s the point of renewing your vows?
That’s a very fair question. After all, why go to the trouble of arranging a (potentially) major ceremony? And it’s not just the bother. What about all the expense?
So there has to be a justifying reason for holding such an event.
That’s what I want to look at in this blog. (Incidentally, another time we can look at how to mark it, once it’s decided on.)
The fact is that there are many reasons why you might choose to be renewing your vows.
An achievement
The fact that you have managed one year as a married couple is actually something to celebrate! And if you’ve managed more than that, then that’s even more laudable!
A lot of people go for an anniversary that ends in 5 or 0. And why not?
Declaring your love
It may sound soppy, when you see it written, but a public affirmation of your mutual love can be a very beautiful thing. Friends and family will love it; moreover, it should strengthen your relationship even more. So don’t knock it!
Out the tunnel
You may have had a sticky time of it. Perhaps you’ve endured either (or both!) of the following problems (or others): financial crises; health issues. The fact that you’ve overcome adversity and are still together does deserve to be marked.
There may have been fidelity concerns, or worse, but now they’re resolved. Renewing your vows would be a public statement of intent. (It could even be – but certainly doesn’t have to be – an opportunity for the guilty party to own up and even apologise publicly.)
Changed circumstances
Depending on how long ago you married, things may now be very different.
- The vows you promised then may no longer be relevant. You can declare other vows that are more meaningful to you.
- You may have children now. You can hold a ceremony that involves them. They can be given a role in the ceremony. Thus the family bond can be strengthened.
- For whatever reason, you may not have enjoyed your wedding, and would welcome a second chance!
Thinking of friends/family
What if you married abroad? A number of friends or relations might well have been unable to attend. The good news is that you can invite them to a commitment ceremony/blessing nearer to home.
Thinking of yourself
You may simply like the idea of a good ceremony and party. A vow renewal would be a perfect excuse for that!
The vow renewals I have conducted have been motivated by a number of reasons. What might yours be?
Call me and let’s have a chat about it, and see how special we can make your day!
by Michael | Dec 12, 2017 | Blog
With the snow coming down unseasonably hard in Harrow as I write, my thoughts turn to wedding weather. Not unreasonably, I suppose.
The weather can make such a difference …
So what arrangements can you make, if inclement weather looks like ruining your big day?
Clearly, it will make a difference whether your ceremony will be held outdoors, or not. The amount of warning you may have about dodgy weather may also play a part. If it’s a freak storm, you may be taken completely by surprise.
One wedding I took was meant to have begun at 5.30 (when it was very sunny and warm). Unfortunately, it couldn’t actually begin till 7.00 p.m., and the rain bucketed down. Nobody could have foreseen that.
All we could do was to borrow a parasol, so that at least the couple were protected!
Eventualities
If you’re using the garden of a private venue, say, there may be the possibility of going inside. The owners will appreciate maximum warning, of course, and there may be problems of space etc. Your guests will accept a little discomfort in the circumstances!
Should you (or, rather, the venue) be providing chairs, it may be possible to get the venue staff to dry them off just before everyone arrives (although that doesn’t solve the problem of continuous rain!).
If there isn’t that option, you simply have to grin and bear it. It will help a little bit, if your celebrant can add a bit of humour to the proceedings, but it may not be as fun as you would hope. However, with sufficient warning, you may be able to prepare umbrellas for your guests (and for the couple!). And once you’re wet, you’re wet …!
Maybe you know that it’s likely to be really muddy. Then you might want to warn people by e-mail (or even do so in the original invitation, especially if it’s a winter wedding). High heels may not be a great idea. A venue might be able to lay down some matting, or whatever, for the ceremony area.
If it’s freezing, unless you can lay on some hot water bottles, you will have to rely on people being sensible enough to come prepared.
For an outdoor winter wedding, it makes sense that, when you prepare the service with your celebrant, you aim at a reasonably brief ceremony. Another factor is that wind may make it very hard to hear what is going on. I did a Vow Renewal at Stonehenge last year. It was wonderful, but I was glad that it was a only a small ceremony, as the incessant wind presented real challenges to my vocal cords!
Good weather!
I ought to mention fine weather weddings (even in this country!). Especially if it’s a hot spell, organise shade, if you can – and water – for guests at outdoor weddings. Parasols may be a possibility.
Attitudes
Every wedding has its professional moaners, however beautiful and faultless it may be. Accept it! But realise that the vast majority of people will NOT blame you for the rain, snow, wind or sun, and will actually take Acts of God in their stride. Do what you can to mitigate stormy weather, and enjoy what you can.
At the very least, it may be a day that you and your guests never forget!
by Michael | Mar 15, 2017 | Blog
Are you planning a wedding, vow renewal or any other celebrations? I have good news for you!
There’s more choice out there than you may suspect. In fact, the world (of celebrations) is your oyster.
Well, what’s it to be? Conventional, way-out or something in-between?
First impressions
When people meet me, they often think I’m quite sane! That’s because part of me actually is.
However, on further acquaintance, they come to realise that I have a zany side too.
This mixture works very well in a civil celebrant. I can supply almost everyone’s needs!
“Normal”
I often get asked to put together and perform pretty conventional ceremonies. After all, some people may want a full religious service, but are unable to have this through their church. That might be because they are marrying someone of another faith. Or it could be a divorced Catholic who wants to marry again.
Be that as it may, these ceremonies may be very like what you’d expect in a church or synagogue etc. They can contain traditional readings and rituals. The main difference is that the service is led by someone (me!) who is a lay reader (ie not ordained).
“Woo-woo”
One of the beauties about a celebrant-led ceremony is that you can choose to personalise it. It may include features from other cultures (the Apache wedding blessing is a favourite) and a few religious elements. It may contain spiritual readings and rituals.
You can hold it wherever you wish (within reason). That can make it really exciting. Maybe Stonehenge is your idea of a brilliant venue? It can be arranged. What about atop Ben Nevis?
If you want pagan (or even part-pagan!), you only have to ask.
The point is that you can construct the ceremony that YOU want, that matches your personalities and beliefs. And that seems just right for your big day.
Compromise
Sometimes people are faced with a dilemma. They may want a secular ceremony, for example, but feel that that could offend their parents or even guests. Fortunately, your celebrant can help you include elements of religion into a largely secular service, and you can – hopefully! – keep everybody happy.
A same-sex ceremony may not please everybody, unfortunately. A little compromise with the wording and structure may go a long way.
Preparing a ceremony that is bespoke and unique to you is utterly appealing. The result should be an event that is beautiful and unique and unforgettable, whether it is oddball or basically conventional, or something in-between.
And surely that’s what you’re looking for (and deserve) for your big day!
by Michael | Feb 27, 2017 | Blog
This is my third and final review of luxury London venues for your wedding/vow renewal. I rather wish it wasn’t coming to an end – reviewing these establishments wasn’t much of a hardship, in truth!
[Please note that my disclaimers (from my previous articles) still apply.]
The Rosewood
The Rosewood in High Holborn could hardly be more central and convenient. The signage was so discreet that I wasn’t sure which of the doors led to the Reception!
However, once in, I was very impressed by the appearance. Only three years old, at the time of writing, the hotel looked well cared-for. It was spacious, elegant and classy (without being snooty).
I’d love to have included my photos, but something went amiss. At least, here’s one picture (from the website), and that will give you a feel for the place.
Source: rosewoodhotels.com Rosewood London
Service is very important, clearly, and anyone who books a wedding here will be well looked-after. The ballroom, which includes a PA system, can take 280 people, and its foyer around 240. There is also a “living room” (capacity c. 30) and dining room (c. 20). Both the latter could be ideal for a smaller event, such as a Vow Renewal.
The Rosewood have recommended suppliers and would organise whatever is required. But as quite a number of weddings here are Jewish, outside kosher catering is brought in. You can arrange most other suppliers yourself – florists, for example.
Stylish and professional, the Rosewood will not be cheap, but you will surely get what you pay for here.
The Lanesborough
The Hotel is in a remarkable location. It is situated on Hyde Park Corner (literally), in a beautifully restored 18th century building that was once a hospital (now St George’s, Tooting).
It is flexible, as far as meeting the needs of its clients is concerned, and has a variety of rooms suitable for weddings or vow renewals of differing sizes.
I believe the hotel’s reputation speaks for itself – the decor is glorious and I appreciated the friendly attentiveness of the staff, who clearly aim at keeping the customer happy. They are only too pleased to help.
The Goring
Perhaps surprisingly for Central London, The Goring is still a family-run hotel (and has been for over a century). It has been much frequented by royalty, so the decor is opulent and the service discreet, but thoroughly attentive. The Goring is the only hotel in the world to be granted a Royal Warrant by HM The Queen for Hospitality Services.
There are two rooms suitable for holding a ceremony and reception: The Drawing Room and The Garden Room. They are both intimate and intensely tasteful. The Garden Room has its own private sunken terrace, which leads to the unexpectedly large and attractive private garden, with its own private terrace, which is a lovely feature.
The Drawing Room at Night
The hotel, full of lovely chandeliers and tasteful decor, oozes class, yet does so without pretension. For enquiries, please email privatedining@thegoring.com
The Garden Room at the Goring
