by Michael | Jan 23, 2017 | Blog
After my first piece on the subject, I am continuing my trawl through the luxury London venues (well, someone has to do it!).
I paid a visit to the Ritz Hotel. My expectations were high, I confess.
The reception I received was extremely friendly, although the elegance and opulence of my surroundings took my breath away! I was pleasantly surprised how quiet the building was, despite fronting on to Piccadilly. The decoration of the rooms is stunning, particularly in the part that, though only belonging to the hotel for about 10 years, is actually the oldest.
The Ritz has three relatively informal rooms for smaller gatherings and one that takes about 75. One of the small rooms overlooks the Ritz’s own garden (I didn’t even know they had one!) and Green Park. The rooms cannot be said to be under-stated, and the ceilings are amazing!
My visit certainly didn’t disappoint.
Moving to Knightsbridge, my next port of call was The Berkeley. I’m not sure it actually announced itself with a sign outside, but perhaps it doesn’t need it!
I was immediately struck by the service. Someone is employed to greet everybody entering the hotel and offer them help. As the hotel proved a little labyrinthine, this was welcome!
This hotel too is being refurbished (January – March 2017), although it looked in excellent order to me! It has a ballroom, currently seating 100-180, which will be extended, and will accommodate nearer 220. As a celebrant, I was relieved that a microphone and built-in speakers are available as part of the package.
The hotel has its own recommended suppliers, but, if the client prefers to bring someone in from outside, this is not an issue.
This is a hotel with considerable style.
By contrast, I went a little out of London (Elstree) to visit the Village Club Hotel. This is a very modern building with little of the character of the two others. However, it has its own atmosphere, and modern facilities (and, not least, free parking).
Flexibility is the watchword, seemingly. The ballroom can fit in 180-200 maximum, but divides up, so smaller numbers can be accommodated. There is a terrace outside, which is available. There is also a reception area, as you come in, offering a private bar.
The hotel will provide catering and the like, but, subject to certain conditions, welcomes outside suppliers.
There are also smaller rooms that may suit cosier affairs.
As your ever-obliging civil celebrant, I plan to submit one further review, and I hope to be offering useful service.
by Michael | Oct 18, 2016 | Blog
Hurrah for the rise of mixed-faith ceremonies!
People are beginning to realise that weddings, naming ceremonies, and even funerals, do not have to be confined to either the full religious or the totally secular. There really is a middle ground.
More and more people are marrying outside the church (or synagogue, temple etc.). In 2011, 59.3% of the population considered themselves Christian, which leaves a lot of people who don’t. Moreover, 25.1% professed no religion at all.
Did you know…?
Interestingly, only 30% of weddings in 2015 were celebrated in a place of worship. Of the remaining 70% who opted for a civil ceremony, some chose the register office, but most preferred approved premises. The latter mostly meant hotels (42.8%) followed (11.6%) by corporate and event spaces.
So people are voting with their feet, as it were.
Why the rise of part-religious ceremonies?
Of course, a number of churches will not marry a couple if they don’t comply with certain conditions. A divorcee may not marry in a Catholic church. So the only way these people can have a religious (or part- religious) service is to use a civil celebrant.
The same applies for people who may prefer a secular service, but who want to respect the wishes of parents, say. They’d therefore like a few (possibly, minimal!) religious elements.
In a similar way, some couples will choose to include a religious element or two as a gesture to guests who are religiously active.
More commonly, however, people of mixed faith may want to embrace and celebrate both their religions and cultures. A civil ceremony will allow just that.
Mixed-faith
I have been privileged to offer a number of couples the opportunity to pick the elements from two religions that they want to include and share. For example, we have had the bride circle the groom (multiple religions), the groom has stamped on a glass (Jewish) and both have “jumped the broom” or undergone handfasting ceremonies (pagan), and we have drunk from the Loving Cup (a variation of a Christian ritual).
So there are a goodly number of reasons why the trend for civil weddings (and celebrations) is rising.
To find out how I, as a civil celebrant, can help you, please get in touch with me for a non-obligation chat. I look forward to hearing from you.
Featured image courtesy of Philippa Gedge photography.
by Michael | May 3, 2016 | Blog
It can be a major mistake to overlook the opportunity to celebrate a Vow Renewal.
Some people assume that it’s simply an excuse to blow a load of money. Others don’t see the point: so what, if it’s my tenth (or whatever) year of marriage?
But you could really be missing out on something special.
Something special
What if you could come away from your Vow Renewal feeling the same as this couple?
“Thank you being our celebrant and putting together our vow renewal, the words felt very personal to us which made it quite an emotionally fuelled ceremony that just flowed but embraced everything we wanted with the readings, blessings of our rings, lighting of our unity candles and finally the signing of our certificate. Our friends and family all commented on how we always do things a bit different and this ceremony and celebration exceeded that. Thank you x”
[C & D – Genuine testimonial]
So what is a Vow renewal?
Essentially, it is an opportunity to reaffirm publicly your marital relationship. You may want to mark a special milestone year – or a new time in your marriage (following ill health, financial difficulties or even a rocky relationship).
Unlike your wedding, there are no legalities to worry about. The ceremony can be as lavish or modest as you choose. It can take place in a back garden, beside a canal, in a hotel or at the top of the Shard. You choose.
How is the occasion marked?
There is no prescribed ceremony, so if you want a religious or part-religious service, that’s fine. Secular is also fine! You want to dress up formally? Fine too! Or come casually? Why not?
How about including friends and/or relatives in the ceremony? Maybe you’ve got children and you want to involve them? You could include the lovely Unity Candle ritual. You might consider a handfasting.
You may want to have your rings blessed or recite your vows (your marriage ones, or a new set, if things have changed). You may want to play your favourite band’s music. The choice is huge.
How you mark the occasion is absolutely up to you (though your celebrant will gladly guide and inspire you!).
How to arrange it?
This is likely to be a much more informal affair than a wedding. You may or may not offer a reception. It might be a buffet. You can hold it at a place that means something special to the two of you.
You will probably only need to do the following tasks as a minimum:
- Book a venue (unless you’re using your back garden, say)
- Organise the reception (according to the scale you are envisaging)
- Book your civil celebrant
- Send out invitations
So you can have the people you love and choose around you, as you celebrate your special occasion in the way that you want and dream of.
Isn’t that worth considering?
Michael would be delighted to give you more information or help you arrange your ceremony. Just contact him for a non-obligation chat.
by Michael | Feb 8, 2016 | Blog
You may have seen my recent blog about sample wedding and handfasting ceremonies. (Thanks for showing up again, then!) I promised also to show you some typical ceremonies that I might offer for Vow Renewals and Funerals. I shall be true to my word, as I hope you’d expect.
I’m a Civil Celebrant, so I create and conduct tailor-made ceremonies. That means that there’s no such thing as “typical”, actually. And I’m not now taking into account whether you want religious or humanist, or something in between! Nonetheless, I trust this will give you at least a flavour of what you might expect.
Vow Renewals
RING BLESSING
Rings are symbolic of the completed bond. The ring is without a beginning or end the ring goes on forever.
Circles of life, circles of love, these rings are given and received as a token of continuous never- ending love and devotion. They are an outward symbol of your inward promise that each of you have made to one another.
D., take C.’s hand… touch the ring that you have given to your Bride as the lasting symbol of your love.
Repeat after me, D: C., with this ring, I promise to continue to grow with you, to build our love, to speak openly and honestly, to listen to you, and to love and cherish you now and forever. This ring serves as the pledge of my love and as the symbol of our unity.
C., take D.’s hand… touch the ring that you have given to your Groom as the lasting symbol of your love.
Repeat after me, C.: D., with this ring, I promise to continue to grow with you, to build our love, to speak openly and honestly, to listen to you, and to love and cherish you now and forever. This ring serves as the pledge of my love and as the symbol of our unity.
UNITY CANDLE
“This Unity Candle is a symbol of the marriage, representing the two becoming one
Having recited their vows, the couple will now light each of the individual candles and jointly light the Unity Candle as a symbol of their recommitment to each other.
As C. and D. light the Unity Candle from their individual candles, they combine their own flames into one. As each candle may light another without diminishing its own light, so may two join together without diminishing each other. Marriage is a partnership where each may give of themselves, without losing that which makes each one unique.”
Funerals
Introductory
(Name’s) earthly journey has ended (too soon) and yet we know that all that lives must die. Nothing prepares us for days like today because we are never ready to lose someone we love.
Grief is ultimately the price we pay for love. You know that the light of the most distant star continues to reach the earth long after the star itself has gone out, so (name’s) light and love will continue to shine in your hearts. This light never goes out because love lives in our hearts and love never dies.
Reading
But although we mourn a life that has ended prematurely, we are mourning a full life. Wherever a life finishes, there it is complete. Its value lies not in its length but in the use that is made of it. A person may live into extreme old age, and yet have lived very little. It was Abraham Lincoln who said “It’s not the years in your life that count, but the life in your years.” There was certainly plenty of life in (name’s) years and we only have to look around this chapel to see the impact that he/she had on so many people.
And it’s important that our recollections of him/her, even today, are not unduly coloured by the deep sadness we feel at this time. Of course we shall grieve, of course we can’t avoid the sense of injustice, that one we cared about should have been snatched from us. But we owe it to (name’s) memory and everything he/she meant to us to honour and celebrate his/her life, to focus on the positive reminiscences, to recapture some of those things that made him/her the unique and special person he/she was, and to smile as we remember him/her. The character, humour and individuality that were so much a feature of (name’s) life will live on in the memories of friends and family much longer than the acute sadness we are feeling at his/her passing.
Poem
Vanished Stars
There are stars up above,
So far away we only see their light
Long, long after the star itself is gone.
And so it is with people that we loved –
Their memories keep shining ever brightly
Though their time with us is done.
But the stars that light up the darkest night,
These are the lights that guide us.
As we live our days, these are the ways we remember.
Hannah Senesh
So just an idea, perhaps, of what we can put together for you. If you would like to find out more, please contact me on 07931 538487 or at celebrant@vowsthatwow.co.uk. I look forward to being able to help you further.
by Michael | Jan 6, 2016 | Blog
As a celebrant, most of the ceremonies I conduct are reasonably conventional (although all are unique – specific to the couples or individuals concerned, because I specialise in tailor-made ceremonies).
Every so often I get asked for something a bit more way out.
Of course, “way out” means one thing to some people and something quite different to others. So perhaps it would be easier if I defined what I had in mind by the term “conventional”.
Conventional
A “conventional” wedding will contain most, if not all, of the following:
- an introduction or welcome;
- readings, sometimes delivered by friends or family – these can be prose or poetry, and can be chosen specially by the couple or suggested by the celebrant;
- music – this is unlikely to be “traditional” – although there’s nothing to stop people throwing in a hymn or the like. It may well reflect the couple’s personal preferences or a significant moment in their relationship;
- the vows – these may be written by the couple (with or without celebrant input) or simply suggested by the celebrant. They may be memorised or (more advisable!) read from a card or repeated after the celebrant;
- a ring blessing;
- a celebrant address – this may be something on the importance of marriage combined with the couple’s ‘story’ ;
- maybe, a ritual or two – for example, lighting a unity candle.
Such weddings may feature the bride in white; several, many or no religious elements; and a variety of choices of music and texts.
Venues can be just as varied, of course. Provided the legal part of the wedding has taken place (ie before registrars), imagination or budget would seem to be the main limitations as to where you hold the ceremony.
More ‘way out’
However, I am occasionally asked to do a couple of less middle-of-the-road ceremonies. One was a naturist wedding (I’m afraid, I have no photographs!) and another, a pagan wedding with a difference.
This wasn’t an ‘ordinary’ pagan wedding – if any can be thus termed – as the pagan was marrying a (half!) Jew, so elements from both cultures had to be combined (and explained to guests).
It was a handfasting ceremony, so that also set this apart.
The venue was certainly striking, as we were on top of Old Sarum, near Salisbury. This was of particular significance, because this iron age fort is very exposed, as the photo above shows, and the chances of a dry wedding were very poor. However, whether it was due to the combination of cultures, or mere coincidence, the sun actually shone (briefly) on the ceremony, and we were all able to enjoy the most wonderful experience.
Be bold!
So you have choices. Weigh them up and decide wisely. Bear in mind that a personalised wedding can be so special. Do give it consideration!
