Of course your wedding day should be harmonious!
What about the run-up to it, though?
For a start, you may not have a lot of money at your disposal. Secondly (and not unconnected, usually) you may have parents who are paying for most of, if not all, the event. Thirdly, you and your partner may come from different backgrounds and cultures.
Putting all these issues together and still producing the ceremony you actually want can be quite a challenge!
So here are a few areas to think about.
If your beliefs do not tally with those of the people (probably parents) who are financing your wedding, try and be diplomatic! It may be possible to reach a compromise which keeps all parties happy. The same may, naturally, apply to you as a couple.
The service could include the Lord’s Prayer (to satisfy a practising Christian) and, say, the Apache Wedding Blessing prayer or a love poem (for the non-Christian). Combinations like these can be surprisingly effective.
So, as a couple, discuss what you really want – prayer, meditation, music, rituals, or none of these. Talk it over with your celebrant to customise a wonderful ceremony.
You will need to decide on who else will participate, and in what way. Will you write vows? Will there be ritual? There are many of these questions to consider, but a good celebrant will go through these with you early on, and set your mind at rest.
Don’t Leave It Too Late
You are unlikely to end up with the same ceremony plans that you started with. A lot of things look different over time. Your celebrant will offer you various drafts and you are free to tweak or even rewrite them. Just don’t hurry it.
If you’re working with a wedding planner, allow them time to get all the arrangements in place.
- Work together as a pair (good practice for your married life!) and decide what you really want for your wedding. Remember it is YOUR day, although it can pay to compromise a little.
- Do work with your celebrant to come up with the ceremony you really want.
- Start the process early.
- Look forward to a most wonderful day!!