Last time, we looked at reasons for writing your own marriage vows. We also looked at suggestions how best to go about this.
Of course, you might already have all the ideas you want for the content, but you would probably welcome a few pointers as to what might work well.
Whether you are writing traditional wedding vows or not, the following could be worth considering:
- You will probably want to express deep emotional love for your partner (why else are you going through this whole ceremony?!)
- You can mention your first meeting (was it ‘love at first sight’ or organic growth?)
- You may want to talk about when you first realized you were in love
- How has your life changed since you met your partner, since you fell in love?
- Talk about your plans and aspirations for your future life together – or growing old together
- Promise to stay together in the future, come what may
If you feel uncomfortable expressing such emotions publicly, you can always quote from a song, film or poem that captures what you want to say. You can also use metaphor or simile to get your message across beautifully and effectively – and less embarrassingly!
So think through what you want to say, plan it, put it on paper, and leave the draft for a day, if possible. Then review it and get feedback from someone who knows you (and who will be honest!). Finally, use the above tips to put it all together. Make sure to practise saying it.
To come up with a meaningful, original and affecting set of vows is not as difficult as you may think. The results will certainly be more than worth the effort!
Michael Gordon is a celebrant based in Harrow.