Not the Wedding of Your Dreams

Dec 15, 2015

Of course you are looking for the wedding of your dreams.

married couple on grand staircase

Every wedding is different. I can offer hints that will make almost any wedding better, but there is no one-size-fits-all solution. However, I think that some of these suggestions ought to help you with your wedding, whatever your vision may be.

The “Correct” Wedding

There is no such thing as a “correct” wedding.

Like many, you may go down the formal religious route, if that’s what you want. (Please note: I am not saying “if that’s what your parents want”, which is a whole different – though valid – issue!)

If you’re happy with the non-religious, but formulaic register office ceremony, then, of course, that’s fine too.

However, before deciding, bear in mind that you should celebrate your wedding in the way that makes sense to you (both). You need to follow your instincts. You can be creative. You can be yourself.

You don’t need to believe in God to have a ceremony that is sincere, inviting, personal to you, that will delight not only you both, but your family and friends.

With the help of your civil celebrant, you can create a ceremony that honours different cultures and traditions in a way that unites rather than divides.


Ideally, if your family is financing the affair, they should not dictate their beliefs or wishes on your big day. Please note that I am saying “YOUR big day”. If your parents can let go, there won’t be all that tension, and you’ll be free to have fun and enjoyment throughout the event.

The groom should be a part of the planning process. After all, if you are sharing a whole-life vision, why ignore such an important, significant occasion? The groom should certainly be given a chance to offer input (hopefully, he will not consider himself ‘superior’, nor should he be considered not worth consulting).


If you demand perfection, you probably won’t enjoy the day (or lead-up). Of course, you can aim at a wonderful event and employ relevant, trusted professionals to help achieve that. But the goal of the wedding is that people will remember your wedding five, even ten, years on with a warm glow.

Follow these simple guidelines, and your wedding day should become a great deal more beautiful, memorable, stress-free and successful!