Helpful Hints for a Wonderful Wedding (part one)

Dec 4, 2015

Of course, you want things to go well for your wedding. In fact, you want a wonderful wedding! But it doesn’t just depend on you. Does everybody understand their role?

Weddings can be a time of stress, so it’s important for people to make allowances.

As a civil celebrant myself, I have to point out that the celebrant should be able to play a role in smoothing the way much of the time, but not everything will be within their control!

Here is some advice for those playing an active role in the proceedings:


  • Ensure you don’t get rolling drunk! Apart from anything else, there will be plenty of embarrassing photographic evidence to haunt you later in life. It may also not make the best possible impression on your new relatives!
  • Try and make sure you speak to all your wedding guests (they have come to see and support you).


  • Much of the stress in the run-up to the wedding day is borne by the bride. Do what you can, especially on the day, to share the load.
  • Don’t hide away with your mates; meet and make conversation with your new wife’s friends and even relatives.
  • Don’t get rolling drunk! You have a speech to deliver effectively and the comments I aimed at the bride apply to you just as much.

The bride’s mother

It is good to remember whose big day it actually is – it’s really your daughter’s. So be there early, be willing to help, but don’t criticise either other people or arrangements. This just compounds any stress being experienced.

Be prepared to play second fiddle.

The Groom’s mother

As with the bride’s mother, be supportive rather than domineering or critical. Be helpful and open and say nice things to the bride! Don’t try and get revenge for a perceived slight during the wedding planning.

The Father(s)

Just like the bride and groom, you need to be sober and in control, not least when toasting the couple’s marriage.

Don’t use the opportunity to get even with somebody who you feel has affronted you during the wedding build-up.

If you want advice on the best man, maid of honour, ushers, bridesmaids and children, please be patient, as my very next blog will address this.