Who’s Heard of A Civil Celebrant

Who’s Heard of A Civil Celebrant

by | Oct 21, 2014 | Blog

Although I do my best to get about and spread the word, I find there’s still a lot of confusion about what civil celebrants really do and what they can offer. I hope that this brief blog can clear things up a bit.

Imagine …!

What if a full religious wedding doesn’t rock your boat?

What if the totally non-religious, standardised Register Office ceremony isn’t really all that special for your big day?

What if you could go to the Registry Office in the morning in your jeans, with a couple of witnesses, sign the marriage certificate and then enjoy a wonderful, joyous, memorable ceremony in the afternoon with all your guests?

Nowadays, you can. That’s where a civil celebrant comes in.

As long as the legal bit is still carried out, there’s nothing to stop you holding the ceremony you actually want – at the venue you want, in the way that you want.

The Ceremony

One of the beauties about a celebrant-led wedding is that he or she will help you (as much or as little as you want!) to build your own ceremony. So if you want a religious component (or perhaps one or two drawn from various cultural sources), put that in, by all means; if you want spiritual elements, go for it; poems and favourite texts are absolutely fine. With some give and take, you should be able to please yourselves AND keep your parents happy!

As with the readings, you decide on the music. You also decide on the choreography (who walks or stands where), the readers, any address, the wording, and delivery, of the Vows. Your celebrant will be pleased to advise and make helpful suggestions. This process is usually conducted by e-mail after an initial mutual fact-finding conversation (face-to-face or by Skype).

At a wedding blessing ceremony - jumping the broom

Ritual

You will be able to incorporate any rituals and little touches of your choice that would not otherwise be possible. For example, drinking from a loving cup, burning a Unity Candle, Jumping the Broom or celebrating a handfasting (an ancient Celtic betrothal ritual).

Conclusion

In short, this is YOUR day, and your civil celebrant, who will of course conduct the ceremony for you, will do everything to ensure that the day is unforgettable, meaningful and what YOU want.

I hope this clarifies things. If you still have questions, don’t hesitate to ask me! I’ll be delighted to help.

Michael Gordon can help prepare and conduct a tailor-made civil ceremony (including weddings, vow renewals, handfastings, ring blessings, baby namings) in or around London or, indeed, Europe.                              

Ancient Greek Wedding Customs

by | Apr 2, 2013 | Blog

You might be surprised at Ancient Greek wedding customs. I thought it would make an interesting change to share this with you.

Getting Engaged

According to the Ancient Athenians, a woman could not marry at all unless a (male) relation or legal guardian publicly gave permission. She would normally have suitors, who would be in competition with each other to win her hand. They might bring presents for her or compete in various ways (physically or artistically). The choice would not normally be down to the woman.

Once the suitor was chosen, he and the girl’s father would shake hands and pronounce some ritual phrases. The engaged couple would then make a binding promise.

Marriage

The marriage ceremony would start with a sacrifice to encourage the gods to bless the couple. Then the future wife would cut her hair signifying her previous virginity. The two would than take a ceremonial bath in holy water. The water would be poured from a loutophorus. Smaller ones might be given to the gods to bless the marriage. After the bath, a feast was prepared at the bride’s house. This was for the men, so the women would sit and wait until they had finished.

This same custom (men eating before the women) took place during other meals as well as the marriage feast. Women were allowed to control the conversation, once admitted to dine with the men.

The woman consecrated the marriage by moving into the suitor’s living quarters.] Once the woman stepped in the house, their pre-nuptial vows were legalized. A dowry was given to the husband from the wife. She often did not have any possessions to give, so the father or whoever gave her away provided a dowry, which was important for the couple.

 

Michael Gordon is a (more up-to-date!) wedding celebrant based in London