by Michael | Aug 16, 2019 | Blog
So you’ve recently got engaged? Congratulations! How did your family react to the news? Are you on ‘cloud nine’?
Maybe you’ve kept your feet on the ground. You may feel ready to start planning your wedding. However, you may have no real idea where to begin.
So let’s look at how you might set off on your journey.
Initial Steps
Naturally,
each couple will do things their own way, so I can’t be prescriptive. However,
these are issues you’ll need to look at very early on:
- How are you going to arrange things?
Will you hire a wedding planner, will a friend or relative take this over, or
will it be down to you?
- Decide on your budget. Make a list of
suppliers you may need and guests you are likely to invite.
- Choose a date. There’s lots to bear
in mind. You may have a particular date in mind (a year on from your
engagement; your late grandmother’s birthday, for example). But the date may be
a Bank Holiday, so it can be more expensive to hire suppliers. It may be the
wrong day of the week (some days are more expensive than others)
First suppliers
Assuming you
know the month (if not, day) of the wedding, the most important people to
contact next are:
- The Register Office
- The wedding venue
- Caterers
The Register
Office will need at least a month’s notice (because of the banns) and you need
to book the registrars. (You can either go into the Office with two witnesses
or the registrars will come to your venue – subject to certain conditions.)
The wedding
venue can be a religious building (Anglicans, Jews and Quakers can currently host
the whole ceremony (without the need actively to involve the registrars). If your
ceremony is in a secular building (a restaurant, hotel, castle etc.), the
registrars may come out, or their officiant can be a civil celebrant.
You usually
have to book popular venues at least a year in advance.
Likewise
with some caterers. So do your homework, and don’t leave it too late to book
these particular suppliers.
The second raft
You may need to book the entertainment quite early. The same may apply to other suppliers – you can be looking at photographers, florists, celebrants, as well as limousines, hair and make-up artists, dress and suit-makers, and the like.
So that
should be enough to set you on your way.
A great
guide (OK, I wrote it!) is “Your Wedding Guide”, available on Amazon. It takes
you right through this process in much more detail – and is very reasonably priced!
https://www.amazon.co.uk/Your-Wedding-Guide-Helping-Minefield/dp/1508444862/ref=sr_1_1?keywords=Your+Wedding+Guide+Michael+Gordon&qid=1561732461&s=books&sr=1-1
Image: Robin Higgins, Pixabay
by Michael | Jun 3, 2019 | Blog
I am very grateful to my guest all the way from Australia, Bronte Price, who has contributed this very useful piece on planning your wedding. Enjoy!
Weddings are beautiful events; full of life, fun and frolic. Of course, you want only the best on your wedding day. There are a thousand other aspects that are part of a wedding, apart from just the dress or the food. A lot of strategic planning goes into having that picture-perfect image you have in mind. It becomes an arduous task without a stepwise guide and checklist. It’s easy to miss out on something in times like these, when a lot of tasks overlap with each other.
In today’s world, weddings can be a costly
and posh affair. Unlike what happened in the past, most weddings are brought
together by the couple getting married. They take help from celebrants and
event planners to plan their big day efficiently. Remember, with a wedding,
something as trivial as the flower girl or the entrées can make or break the
day.
It is wise to outsource specific tasks in
order to have some bandwidth left for crucial tasks that need your attention.
Additionally, having it, all planned out in advance will save you all the
stress that you don’t want to show on your face.
Here’s how to plan a wedding checklist to save you the
trouble.
1.
Sit down with your partner and
decide on your wedding priorities:
It could be the attire or the guests or
anything else for that matter. As soon as you engage in discussion with your
partner or with others close to you, you will get more ideas. You don’t want to
set the wrong priorities and regret them later. Check that your priorities are
in line with something that would matter to you in the long run. And now you
can move on your planning from this point.
2.
Having a wedding binder can be
a big help:
You can either choose to keep your notes
haphazardly or be wise and have them all in one place. There are several
binders that you can find online. These will help you organise things based on
the different tasks for the day. You can download them and print them later to
use these templates.
3.
Decide on your colour and a
possible theme:
You want your wedding to be memorable. You
want it to say things about you, your partner and the story you both share. A
wedding is an excellent occasion to tell the world about your creativity and
choices. You don’t want to go wrong here and regret it later. Decide on a
colour pallet, depending on your preference and the season that you are getting
married in. For example,
4.
Determine a comfortable budget:
It’s easy to plan the best possible things
for your wedding and go overboard. What is hard is to be able to pay for all of
that. Plan a strategic budget that allows you to have a decent wedding and not
go bankrupt after that. Once a budget is decided, you can choose to play around
how much you are willing to spend on what areas. You can also choose to
research online and find creative ways to save
money on your wedding while still having your dream-like wedding. It
will take some extra effort but will be absolutely worth it.
Most newlyweds complain that they go
overboard and deviate by about 45% after the actual wedding. This is why it’s
wise to have something in reserve and be mentally prepared for it.
5.
Assemble your team:
Nowadays, couples are taking complete
responsibility for planning their weddings. With the ease
of having a celebrant, it’s wise to outsource all the duties to an
expert in the field. You would still need to have a core team to help you with
the execution. Decide on your team based on your comfort level with them and
their expertise. It could be a family member, a colleague or a friend. See to
that, that they are happy to take up the task too.
6.
Start jotting down your guest
list:
This is a big task when it comes to most
weddings. Decide on a number, based on your budget and the kind of venue you
have in mind. There will be some guests that won’t turn up; be wise to
calculate accordingly. There will always be some guests that you will miss out
on inviting to your wedding. This might seem hard, but it is absolutely crucial
to provide the best to the ones you are inviting. You don’t want to invite all
the guests you have in mind and not be able to cater to them appropriately.
Understand that guests need to be attended and fed, which takes both effort and
resources.
7.
Pick a date:
You might want to get married on a date
that holds some sentimental value to you. See if it coincides with any other
popular wedding date. Check if you’re going to get married on a weekday or a
weekend.
8.
Book your venue & an
officiant:
Once your dates are finalised, do not delay
in booking your venue. Chances are, there are many others in line wanting to
get married on that day at the same place.
There can be fun ways of getting married.
Book an officiant of your choice, based on your religious beliefs. You can save
money by getting your family members or closest friends to perform your wedding,
but the quality of their performance will not be guaranteed.
There will be many other tasks that will
eventually need attention. However, they will all fall into place if they are
planned in advance.
Author Bio:
Bronte Price is Australia’s First Certified civil celebrant in Melbourne and the co-founder of The Equality Network that helps wedding suppliers create a better wedding experience for LGBTI couples. He is also a member of GLOBE (Gay and Lesbian Organization for Business and Enterprise) that empowers the LGBT community. His stand on ‘marriage equality’ and ‘love has no boundaries’ is unparalleled. Apart from that, he enjoys volunteering as a newsreader at Joy 94.9, spends time in his organic backyard vegetable garden and goes on walks with his fiancée Clint and their four-legged fur baby – Bingo.
Image: Robin Higgins, Pixabay
by Michael | Feb 16, 2016 | Blog
Everybody’s ideas for their wedding are likely to be different, but from a civil celebrant perspective, here are 5 hints for planning your wedding which you will probably need to consider, whatever your circumstances.
- The budget
You’ll be very fortunate, if this isn’t one of your prime concerns. You’ll need to work together with anyone who is helping you here (probably your family?), and decide rationally what you will spend. It’s no good getting carried away with enthusiasm – you need self-discipline.
Big as the occasion may be, you do not want to bankrupt yourselves. And remember that the amount spent does not guarantee the success of the marriage!
The real event is (or should be) the ceremony. Do you really want the reception to mean more than the vows?
Good taste and sincerity are surely what matter.
This doesn’t mean that you can’t have a few OTT touches (budget permitting), but that should be a bonus rather than what you are aiming at. There are probably certain elements that you will insist on, and it’s as well to discuss these at the outset, so that they aren’t overlooked later.
The budget will also dictate the ceremony, participants, reception and number of guests to invite, but that is something I cover elsewhere, notably in my book “Your Wedding Guide”.
- Date & location
Naturally, it will be more expensive to schedule your wedding at peak times (such as summer holidays, Christmas or around Valentine’s Day). You may want to avoid major events, such as World Cups and holiday season, when your potential guests may be otherwise engaged.
You’ll need to consider climate too, if you want an outdoor wedding.
The venue should, of course, be where you want it to be, but if it’s in an exotic location, your guests may have to go to a lot of expense and trouble to attend, so keep that in mind.
- Other Suppliers
As soon as you have settled on your budget, start discussing other suppliers that you may need. Like the venue, which may need a year or more advance warning, you should allow plenty of time, in order to secure the supplier of your choice.
Among others, you will need to consider florists, caterers, musicians and, not least, celebrant. Where possible, you should meet with these first, so you can feel confident you have made the right choices. All that takes time, so allow for that.
- Choosing theme and colours
It’s easy to get excited and let your imagination run away with your wallet. Keep your budget in mind, use wedding books and planning guides and whatever resources are available to you.
Do not over-decorate. Make full use of flowers and candles.
Be creative with the colours. These may reflect the bride’s personality. Vivid colours (tastefully combined) can be most effective.
- Vows and music
The vows are one of the most important elements of a marriage. They should be well-planned – and audible. They are a public declaration of your mutual feelings, and should not be under-estimated.
Equally, the music should be planned carefully and be clearly audible. Make sure you choose lyrics that you want your guests to hear.
Hopefully, the planning will be a team effort (maybe even the groom will be involved!). If approached in the right way, it can be challenging, yes, but also exciting, and the end result so worthwhile. Enjoy!
by Michael | Aug 5, 2014 | Blog
Every wedding is different. Some hints can make almost any wedding better, but there is no one-size-fits-all solution. However, some of these suggestions ought to be able to help you with your wedding, whatever your vision may be.
Thanks to www.NeliPrahova.com
The “Correct” Wedding
As I’ve indicated, there is no such thing as a “correct” wedding.
Like many, you may go down the formal religious route, if that’s what you want. (Please note: I am not saying “if that’s what your parents want”, which is a whole different – though valid – issue).
If you’re happy with the non-religious, but formulaic registry office ceremony, then, of course, that’s fine too.
However, before deciding, bear in mind that you should celebrate your wedding in the way that makes sense to you (both). You need to follow your instincts. You can be creative. You can be yourself.
You don’t need to believe in God to have a ceremony that is sincere, inviting, personal to you, that will delight not only you both, but your family and friends.
With the help of your civil celebrant, you can create a ceremony that honours different cultures and traditions in a way that unites rather than divides.
Planning
Ideally, if your family is financing the affair, they should not dictate their beliefs or wishes on your big day. Please note that I am saying “YOUR big day”. If your parents can let go, there won’t be all that tension, and you’ll be free to get fun and enjoyment out of the whole event.
The groom should be a part of the planning process. After all, if you are sharing a whole-life vision, why ignore such an important, significant occasion? The groom should certainly be given a chance to offer input (hopefully, he will not consider himself ‘superior’, nor should he be considered not worth consulting).
Perfection
If you demand perfection, you probably won’t enjoy the day (or lead-up). Of course, you can aim at a wonderful event and employ relevant, trusted professionals to help achieve that. But the goal of the wedding is that people will remember your wedding five, even ten, years on with a warm glow.
Follow these simple suggestions, and your wedding day should become a great deal more beautiful,, memorable and successful!
Michael Gordon can help prepare and conduct a tailor-made civil ceremony in or around London or, indeed, in Europe.
