by Michael | Jun 29, 2021 | Blog
People choose to work with a celebrant because they want their ceremony to stand out. Not run-of-the-mill, but memorable, unique and unforgettable.
So the extraordinary may just be an ordinary part of my job.
On the negative side, I rang a bride a couple of days before the wedding to check all was well. She asked me if the groom hadn’t rung me. No, he hadn’t.
It turns out that the wedding was off, after the groom had been caught in bed with another woman a few days before the big day!
I don’t know how extraordinary that is, in reality, but it’s my only wedding cancelled for such reasons.
One other instance of a potentially unsuccessful marriage came when I was having a Skype call with a bride. Ordinarily, I have such a call with the couple, but not this time. However, I saw a male figure hovering in the background and asked if that was the groom. Indeed, it was.
“Why don’t you invite him to take part in our conversation?” I asked. “No, this is MY wedding – he’ll do what I say.”
I didn’t work with her, and I only hope the groom got out of it too, as soon as he could!
To be more positive, I’ve been part of some absolutely fabulous ceremonies. The outdoors ones are often more stunning (although the weather can play a major part!). However, the simple joy and love shown by some couples, indoors or out, have been incomparable.
One of the most impressive ceremonies I have conducted was a wedding in Cyprus in a 5-star hotel in the hills overlooking the sea. There were flowers everywhere, people from all over the world, and an unparalleled atmosphere.
Much simpler, but also unforgettable, was the pagan marrying a half-Jew in the open air (in an Iron Age fort) one January! A fabulous mix of cultures – and the rain even held off!
If you’re looking to mark a life-cycle event, such as a wedding, vow renewal, anniversary, naming or handfasting, then consider a chat with me. I can help make your ceremony unique, unforgettable and absolutely extraordinary!
by Michael | May 11, 2021 | Blog
There are some expenses, when you arrange a ceremony, that may be indispensable, but others that you only think are.
You don’t need to spend money on a wedding planner …
- If your ceremony is going to be very small and simple
- If you’re prepared to source and reserve the best suppliers yourself
- If you’re willing to deal yourself with things that may go wrong
- If you can arrange necessary co-ordination between suppliers
You don’t need to spend money on a venue …
- If you think you can hold the event in your backyard
- If you’re prepared to manage the health and safety issues involved
- If you’ve got plenty of support
- If you’re keeping the reception very simple
You don’t need to spend money on a celebrant …
- If you’re not too bothered how professional the officiant actually is
- If you don’t want your ceremony to be really special
- If you’re not worried about the words being easily heard by your guests
- If you want to be calm and relaxed during the ceremony
You don’t need to spend money on caterers …
- If you’re not feeding or watering your guests
- If you’re prepared to buy in and prepare food and drink
- If you can organise the service, such as a buffet, (and clearing-up) yourself
- If you’re not serving up special dishes (eg vegan)
You don’t need to spend money on entertainment …
- If you don’t want a reception
- If you can provide something simple that works
- If you can’t find something entertaining to suit all
You don’t need to spend money on photographers/videographers …
- If you don’t want memories for years to come
- If you’ve got a friend or relative who can do this professionally (and doesn’t mind!)
- If you don’t want to share the event with absentees via livestream or social media
The list could go on! But I hope it gives you something to start on, as you plan your big day – and, if you decide to use a civil celebrant, please have a chat with me!
by Michael | Apr 6, 2021 | Blog
It’s time to take a look at the relatively new trend that is changing the face of weddings across the UK (and beyond).
I’m referring to micro-weddings.
Of course, people are still looking at “traditional” weddings (bride in white, formal processions, receptions for large numbers, and the like). Hopefully, after 21st June, weddings will be unrestricted again (although social distancing will surely still apply) and people will be able to pursue this lovely course of action once more.
However, there are more choices open to couples nowadays, as people have had to adapt to the draconian regulations imposed on us. With guests and participants severely limited, what has changed?
Excessive pomp has been limited, but the budget for weddings has not necessarily decreased. Demand is exceeding supply at the moment, which can add a premium to the budgeting. Couples are also focussing on quality, as that appears more affordable. The guest list might be smaller (allowing you substantial savings), but that has opened the way to, for example, providing better champagne!
As such weddings are often not “traditional”, they can become more personalised. I hardly need say that, as a civil celebrant, I have been offering personalised ceremonies for years, but this is becoming the norm now.
So the proceedings can be far more relaxed. The bride’s father might not give the bride away. The bride might dress in colours or separates. Dresses may be shorter and less formal nowadays.
Venues can be less formal too, as cafes or bandstands come into the equation. Decoration still plays a big part, but quality can stand out at smaller-scale events. There can be personalisation for the guests too – perhaps their name can be inscribed on the cutlery, for example.
Make the ceremony yours.
Don’t forget that a civil celebrant will add so much to your ceremony, whether it be a larger “traditional-style” event or a micro-wedding. Just contact Michael for a chance to find out how!
by Michael | Jan 26, 2021 | Blog
It could be that lockdownitis is getting the better of me, I realise …
The fact is that I went for a stroll on Sunday and a snowman caught my attention. One thought led to another, and I began comparing the snowman to a wedding.
As one does.
Well, I warned you!
But let me justify myself a bit. There are commonalities …
Like a wedding, a snowman is often the product of a combined, collaborative effort. They can be big, small or medium. You can decorate them lavishly, or keep it simple. They often require a lot of work to create. Co-operation is usually of the essence, but an individual can do much of the preparation. They are ephemeral. They can afford a lot of pleasure and can be something that lives on in the memory for years.
You might extend the comparison by going into clothes and so on, but I guess there’s no need to labour the point.
Hopefully, you, my reader, may know somebody planning a wedding. Perhaps you can help them in some way. (Telling them about what I offer – namely, a personalised ceremony – would be a great start!)
They may still be able to have a big wedding (in time), but a micro-wedding can be fabulous. They could even get legally married and then hold a wedding blessing, or the like, some time later. Possibly, on their anniversary.
So, no, I’m not thinking of including a snowman in a wedding ceremony! But next time somebody comes up to you and compares a wedding to a snowman, you’ll be ahead of the game, thanks to me!
by Michael | Nov 30, 2020 | Blog
Customer satisfaction should be any supplier’s bottom line. Under almost all circumstances.
The minimum
Things can, and do, go wrong. Most people understand this. It doesn’t matter how careful you are.
What matters so much is how you respond when something goes awry.
Some suppliers will pass the blame to others. Some deny responsibility. They may even argue and accuse the client of being unreasonable.
That solves nothing.
Suppliers need to remember the adage: “the customer is always right”. If a client is unhappy, the supplier should be concerned. It’s important to listen closely to the complaints and understand the issues.
It may be possible to rectify the problem quite simply and quickly. The vital thing is to resolve it, preferably, graciously. The supplier should acknowledge the matter. An unreserved apology is a good starting point.
Then, can they put it right? This shouldn’t cost their client any extra money or time, either, and the supplier may even have to accept a loss.
The important thing is that, by making it up to the customer, the supplier accepts responsibility and resolves to try and avoid a repetition.
They may well be given a second chance.
My goal
I am not alone in believing that a supplier should aim for “value added plus”. It’s not just a question of satisfying the client, or putting right potential mishaps, but of delighting them.
Shortly after conducting a wedding for a lovely couple, I received this e-mail:
“The ceremony was perfect and flowed seamlessly, our guests also commented on how much they liked Michael and how the whole ceremony was conducted.”
So what should a supplier be doing, to make that ceremony “perfect”?
The Secret?
Of course, there’s no magic formula – not least, because each profession and each supplier is different. However, there are a few principles that will apply generally.
In my field as civil celebrant, I encourage and ask a lot of questions in our initial meeting or conversation. The client may be nervous and needs to appreciate what I can offer. I certainly need to understand their true vision. On occasion, I need to scratch beneath the surface.
If they don’t really know what choices are available, it’s my job to explain them.
I aim to ensure that my clients normally understand my process. That involves sending them drafts that they can change, if they want. It includes payment terms, Ts & Cs., and what I do – and do not – offer. It’s important to be transparent. If there are likely to be any extras, then I’ll be up-front about it.
I don’t want the client to receive any unpleasant surprises. Especially on the big day. I ensure that they approve beforehand every word that I am going to utter at the ceremony.
On occasion, there might be a lot of time between agreeing the ceremony and the big day itself. Keeping in contact – even irregularly – gives peace of mind. It can also serve as a nudge if the client still has something to do (eg write their own vows!).
It’s also important to be accessible, patient and helpful throughout the process.
On the day, I always try to arrive in very good time, check everything carefully and do what I have to do calmly and without fuss. I shall have practised the ceremony, so I can expect to present it professionally and beautifully. I always remember that the event is all about my clients, not about me. I aim to keep them calm and happy.
If you want to find out more about how I can deliver that “wow” factor, please give me a call! A “perfect” ceremony is by no means impossible!
