For most of us 2020 was a dismal year. A few people prospered, and good luck to them. Most of us suffered. Very often, it was health or financial issues. Or both.
More relevant to me, as a celebrant, brides and grooms (and suppliers!) had to put up with plans continually being changed or deferred. The worst thing for many people was simply not knowing. What would the next directive say? What asumptions could anybody make? Why book, when plans could be thrown into chaos the next day?
Of course, some people either gave up altogether or modified their plans drastically.
I lost two weddings to cancellations. In one case, it would have been in a fabulous Lisbon venue. That was postponed, but the venue had to change. It became the superb Palacio de Queluz, Sintra (google that, and just see what it looks like!)
Then the bride and groom found their businesses were struggling. No other choice, but to cancel the wedding. (They may still get married – at a register office, but that’s not quite the same …)
I belong to several Facebook groups where most brides are currently in distress and crying out for guidance.
As I write, there is much talk of another national lockdown – maybe, till after Easter. So do couples move the wedding till the summer, say? Can they book a decent venue at such short notice? Should they assume that they can’t invite more than 15? What sort of COVID precautions should be taken?
I have no more of a crystal ball than anyone else. But my advice is not to delay. At least, go and get married at the Register Office. Then wait.
Wait till we’re out of this and can make sensible decisions. Then organise a wedding service at a venue of your choosing. Book your civil celebrant, photographer and caterer. Even though you will already be legally married – enjoy the whole day with your friends and family as if it were the big day itself.
Then everyone can enjoy and relish the atmosphere of such a special occasion.
Customer satisfaction should be any supplier’s bottom line. Under almost all circumstances.
The minimum
Things can, and do, go wrong. Most people understand this. It doesn’t matter how careful you are.
What matters so much is how you respond when something goes awry.
Some suppliers will pass the blame to others. Some deny responsibility. They may even argue and accuse the client of being unreasonable.
That solves nothing.
Suppliers need to remember the adage: “the customer is always right”. If a client is unhappy, the supplier should be concerned. It’s important to listen closely to the complaints and understand the issues.
It may be possible to rectify the problem quite simply and quickly. The vital thing is to resolve it, preferably, graciously. The supplier should acknowledge the matter. An unreserved apology is a good starting point.
Then, can they put it right? This shouldn’t cost their client any extra money or time, either, and the supplier may even have to accept a loss.
The important thing is that, by making it up to the customer, the supplier accepts responsibility and resolves to try and avoid a repetition.
They may well be given a second chance.
My goal
I am not alone in believing that a supplier should aim for “value added plus”. It’s not just a question of satisfying the client, or putting right potential mishaps, but of delighting them.
Shortly after conducting a wedding for a lovely couple, I received this e-mail:
“The ceremony was perfect and flowed seamlessly, our guests also commented on how much they liked Michael and how the whole ceremony was conducted.”
So what should a supplier be doing, to make that ceremony “perfect”?
The Secret?
Of course, there’s no magic formula – not least, because each profession and each supplier is different. However, there are a few principles that will apply generally.
In my field as civil celebrant, I encourage and ask a lot of questions in our initial meeting or conversation. The client may be nervous and needs to appreciate what I can offer. I certainly need to understand their true vision. On occasion, I need to scratch beneath the surface.
If they don’t really know what choices are available, it’s my job to explain them.
I aim to ensure that my clients normally understand my process. That involves sending them drafts that they can change, if they want. It includes payment terms, Ts & Cs., and what I do – and do not – offer. It’s important to be transparent. If there are likely to be any extras, then I’ll be up-front about it.
I don’t want the client to receive any unpleasant surprises. Especially on the big day. I ensure that they approve beforehand every word that I am going to utter at the ceremony.
On occasion, there might be a lot of time between agreeing the ceremony and the big day itself. Keeping in contact – even irregularly – gives peace of mind. It can also serve as a nudge if the client still has something to do (eg write their own vows!).
It’s also important to be accessible, patient and helpful throughout the process.
On the day, I always try to arrive in very good time, check everything carefully and do what I have to do calmly and without fuss. I shall have practised the ceremony, so I can expect to present it professionally and beautifully. I always remember that the event is all about my clients, not about me. I aim to keep them calm and happy.
If you want to find out more about how I can deliver that “wow” factor, please give me a call! A “perfect” ceremony is by no means impossible!
“Isn’t that a lot of money for just an hour’s work?”
That’s a question I sometimes hear when I’ve quoted for my services. It disappoints me. My work never lasts just one hour. Not even on the day.
Preparation and Experience
If you book me, you get the benefit of my training and experience. Those skills are not easy to acquire. You get my time and availability. You gain my advice, guidance and all-round professionalism. You profit from my presenting skills.
You’ll be getting a unique, tailor-made ceremony, established in harmony with your beliefs and personalities. Your feedback is always respected and your vision will be achieved.
You’ll get an exchange of emails until you’re satisfied with every word that I’ll be saying on the day.
I have conducted over 200 ceremonies (mainly funerals and weddings) since I trained in early 2013. I’ve learned how to stay calm and what needs to be done.
I really care about results.
Sorry about the rant, but that’s part of what you are getting – before the big day – when you book me!
On the Day
I don’t just swan up ten minutes before the start, read a text or two and shoot off again directly.
I leave home in order to arrive about an hour before the ceremony is due to begin. I check with the venue that everything is in place as agreed. It’s not often that I get a chance to see the bride in that hour, but I may be able to send her a message. That way she knows I am there and has one less thing to worry about.
If there is a procession, I aim to make contact with the participants and check that they are happy.
My main task, once I am sure everything is ready, is to chat to the groom. He may be very nervous, so I try and distract him and make him feel good. I will probably meet the Best Man and/or grooms. We check everything is in order.
Then comes the part people see (and imagine is my only task!), namely, conducting the ceremony. On average, we are talking of around half an hour. I make myself available, if wanted, for photos. Unless I’m invited to stay a while, I head off shortly afterwards.
So I hope I’ve put the record straight now!
If you want to find out more, I am happy to offer a non-obligation call. Just let me know.
They say that your wedding is the happiest day of your life.
It marks a public declaration of love. New beginnings. You’re surrounded by the love and support of your family and friends. It’s your special ceremony. You have your special venue. And star-status for a day.
Sure, the build-up can be stressful, although it should also be exciting and fun. However, things have become less simple nowadays, need I point out!
It’s been calculated that over 100,000 weddings have been called off or cancelled since lockdown began in March. That has had a huge impact on wedding-related businesses. A number of these have closed down or are seriously considering their future. That is going to affect your choices, of course.
Having been one of the first sectors to be adversely impacted by COVID-19, the wedding sector is one of the last to re-open. Last Saturday is historically the busiest wedding day of the year – almost 4,500 nationally should have taken place then.
The impact on the industry is almost incalculable.
The only bit of good news is that hundreds of weddings have been rearranged – or will be – for 2021. That could bring a rush of work to the struggling companies – those that survive long enough to benefit.
Couples who are proceeding with their wedding this year are already having to compromise. Social distancing being one of the major issues. That may only get slightly better, as time goes on.
There is one other disadvantage for some couples who are deferring their wedding. You used to be able to buy cancellation cover. Few companies are now providing any wedding insurance cover – and none for Coronavirus-related claims. So couples have little protection and may even be unwilling to risk getting married at all.
Life does go on, but the rest of 2020 is looking quite gloomy for wedding sector businesses. As a celebrant, I am concentrating on hanging in there!
Although one consequence for couples is the possible limiting of supplier choice, there will still be plenty of good, functioning businesses that are available. As ever, you will have to do your homework, but it’s not all doom and gloom. With realistic expectations, you can still enjoy the build-up and have the happiest day of your life!
Feel free to have a chat with me about these matters.
Unless you’ve worked with a civil celebrant before, you don’t really know what you’re getting when you engage one. There are plenty of them out there. Of course, they all have their individual personalities and quirks. That means that one celebrant is not going to be the same as another.
One may shine at razzamatazz, while another will be great at atmosphere building. One may prefer formality and gravity; a different one may throw in humour.
What are your requirements? What do you need to look for? How can you be sure of value for money?
As with choosing any supplier, you need to do some research.
You may be able to rely on first-hand testimonials. You may be attracted by someone’s website. You will have a budget that you do not want to exceed.
So how do you actually choose?
One of the pieces of ‘homework’ you should always do is to speak to the potential supplier. Ask the questions you need answering and get a feel for the supplier. Compare (like-for-like, if possible) with a similar provider.
As a celebrant, I know I am not the most expensive out there, but I am dearer than a number of my competitors. I know I “start at the extra mile”, so I justify this easily enough.
There will be some celebrants who don’t offer the same level of service, but who may well charge less. This will attract some clients, and that’s their decision!
Of course, paying ‘loadsa money’ does not necessarily guarantee quality, but there is a fair chance that someone at the higher end of the scale will supply wonderful service.
It may be useful to study a few reviews before you decide. What do clients recognise that they have gained from working with a celebrant? Is that what you’re looking for?
As a minimum, the celebrant should provide the opportunity to create a personalised ceremony that is beautifully delivered on the day. They should work hand-in-hand with you in order to achieve this.
Caution
At the end of the day, you have to settle on what price you are willing to pay, but don’t just jump for the cheapest! Find out how the supplier works and what they offer before deciding.
Michael would love to have a non-obligation call with you, to show you how he can help you achieve your dream ceremony.
