by Michael | Aug 8, 2022 | Blog
I can save you reading the whole blog!
My spoiler is to tell you that the answer to the question “should I use a wedding planner, or not?” is that it is your choice! However, things are not necessarily so cut and dried.
To start you thinking, I suggest the following:
Reasons NOT to hire a Wedding Planner
- Budget is an issue; hiring a planner even for on-the-day management would mean no funds available for wedding essentials
- You have the time and desire to source and hire all suppliers independently
- You haven’t clicked with any Wedding Planner, as they may not share your vision
- The venue has an amazing co-ordinator whom you trust, or you have a family member happy to take on the role of planner.
Reasons to Hire a Wedding Planner
- You have booked a dry-hire or a marquee wedding. It’s a much greater challenge than a hotel or standard venue because you have to organise everything from scratch.
- A Wedding Planner (WP) may be an outsider, but they can look at issues objectively, and make time-saving and money-saving suggestions. The fact that they have opinions does not imply that the process will be more complicated. it may even be the opposite.
- A WP is not necessarily more expensive than doing it all yourself. The WP is likely to have professional contacts who may offer a better price than those on the open market. Moreover, if your budget is tight, you can usually engage a WP for just a day or a week, although that obviously limits the offering.
- A Wedding Planner has a database of tried-and-tested wedding suppliers, ensuring you have a fabulous team working in synergy on the wedding day. And they can often negotiate discounts due to the repeat business.
- A good WP will work in an advisory role, and not impose their ideas on you! Their experience will allow them to make informed suggestions, but they know that the ultimate decision is down to you. Having said that, the WP may well be able to offer ideas for something unique. The ultimate decision is the couple’s, but the planner will showcase NEW ideas to them.
- Most importantly, perhaps, the WP offers the route to peace of mind, which is invaluable. The WP has that all-important check-list (on paper or in their head) and it is down to them to organise and confirm that everything is in order. This covers a huge range (from caterers to décor, from celebrant to photographer, from florist to make-up artist, and so on).
- The WP pre-empts issues and resolves disasters that might arise due to reasons beyond anyone’s control (and sometimes due to reasons within suppliers’ control too!).
- You might not be the most organised couple in the world and could be feeling frustrated and overwhelmed by the amount of work you need to put in to finalise the plans. The thought of organising a wedding is bringing you out in hot sweats!
- In some cases, couples organise a wedding themselves, but do need support co-ordinating all the suppliers. In these situations, a planner might come on board a few months beforehand to assist the couple.
Conclusion
As I said at the beginning, the final decision has to be down to you,
There may well be justification for arranging things yourself (or with the help of friends and family). In the majority of cases, though, as you’ll guess, I recommend using a WP, if for no other reason than the fact that they will take the weight of worry off your shoulders, not just on the big day but, potentially, for weeks in advance.
You can find reputable Wedding Planners at https://www.ukawp.com/directory-uk-wedding-suppliers/
You might find this article helpful: https://www.ukawp,com/should-i-hire-a-wedding-day-coordinator-
And this one:
Do I need a wedding planner, and what do wedding planners do?
Image: www.elwoodphotography.co.uk
by Michael | Jul 18, 2022 | Blog
It means a lot when your efforts are not just taken for granted! Being appreciated means a great deal.
It is not as simple as it seems to be a celebrant. There are many elements that need to go together to create a successful ceremony.
The work is worthwhile, though, when the couple show their appreciation.
I’d like to give a flavour of what can be achieved. So today I shall simply share a short testimonial I received recently from a happy couple.
“Michael was so wonderful. We chose Michael to officiate our elopement in London immediately after we spoke with him the first time – he resonated much more with us and our very ambiguous ideas for a ceremony. He was so kind and patient, and helped us craft a truly unique and special ceremony. He helped guide us toward a ceremony with so much meaning and encouraged us to bring in our own elements. His words made both of us cry, and his presence and grace made our ceremony truly magical. We couldn’t thank him enough.”
Perhaps you can understand why, although I am relieved (only because of the weather forecast!) that I don’t have a ceremony to conduct this week, I am so looking forward to the next. Being appreciated like this is a huge motive force and is an adrenaline kick. (Yes, I admit it: I’m a bit of a junkie for that!)
So if you know of anybody that would like to share the delight that a memorable ceremony can engender, please pass my details on to them.
I am looking forward to being appreciated again!
by Michael | Jun 27, 2022 | Blog
With all the (justified!) obsessive talk about inflation, the short piece in Saturday’s “Money” section of the “Daily Telegraph” may have gone unnoticed. However, the report (with statistics furnished by American Express) contains some horrifying revelations about how much wedding costs have risen since pre-COVID.
Apparently, it used to cost guests an average of £391 in 2019 to attend a wedding. (That’s quite surprising in itself!) Now, they say, this figure has risen to £883. And we’re not talking destination weddings!
It appears that, across the population, £15.6 billion is spent on outgoings such as accommodation, clothes, grooming and travel.
We learn that hair and beauty costs have jumped up 41% per wedding. Spending on outfits have gone up by more than a fifth to £159. This had accounted for £130 in 2019. Accommodation costs have gone up 31%.
Costs are always going to rise, of course, but it really makes accepting a wedding invitation something to think carefully about. And we aren’t even taking gifts into account!
I don’t think there is much we can do about it. As far as inflation goes, we mostly have to grin and bear it, so the same must go for wedding guest costs. I can’t wave a magic wand (I wish I could!) and resolve things. Mutual awareness, empathy and understanding are important.
Couples will have to consider the circumstances for their guests and be accepting if their guests have to duck out or can’t afford the Maserati that might be on the Wedding List! Just as guests may have to make a sacrifice or two to attend the wedding, so the couple must make sure (without going to extremes) that they show their appreciation to those guests who add so much to the whole affair.
A wedding is still a wonderful, memorable event (especially, with a great celebrant conducting the ceremony!).
But welcome to the new tomorrow!
Photo: www.elwoodphotography.co.uk
by Michael | Jun 21, 2022 | Blog
People think that, because a celebrant is independent, they will not be emotionally involved in what is going on in front of them.
I consider myself as macho as the next wimp (!), and I have often been able to look at a ceremony objectively, though sympathetically. However, that has not always been the case.
Not unreasonably, it was a struggle for me to conduct the funeral of my aunt without tears, but of course I was emotionally involved, which people understood and accepted.
I found it incredibly hard to keep a dry eye when I conducted the funeral of a suicide victim, whose death had come as a total shock to his widow and young children. The general outpouring of grief was devastating.
In some ways, even worse was the time I had to read out the last message from a young lady to the mourners. “Moving” doesn’t describe how it was for me – let alone, the guests present.
I have had to hold back a tear at some celebratory ceremonies too. When I stand right next to a couple, and see the looks of unreserved love they are directing to each other, then that is a privilege and delight. If they cry, then it is hard not to follow suit!
In some cases, the couple has had to overcome huge adversity; in other cases, their stories are more mundane, but their true love no less evident and enjoyable.
I well remember my own wedding some 23 years ago. I was 45 and had given up hope of ever forming a meaningful attachment, let alone, marrying. In 1997, I met the lady who would revolutionise my life.
Isobel had been through an abusive marriage and had not had things easy. She needed the security and love that I would offer her.
Our guests were clearly so happy that we were getting together! You could feel the love, as you entered the building. It really was the happiest day of my life (hopefully, of Isobel’s too!). I couldn’t stop grinning like an idiot!
I think I managed to keep a dry eye, though!
by Michael | Jun 13, 2022 | Blog
It’s not always necessary to spend an arm and a leg on a wedding. Some short cuts may be possible. But pros and cons need to be weighed up carefully.
Wedding Planners
A wedding planner is a pretty essential team-player for an elaborate or large affair. However, you can sometimes manage without one, especially if the ceremony is going to be straight-forward. There will still be a lot of work and responsibility on your shoulders – you may have to source the best suppliers and co-ordinate everything on the day yourself. You may be leaving yourself open to worry and anxiety in the lead-up to, and on, the big day. So think it through first.
The Venue
Again, if the ceremony is going to be very simple, and if you have the space, you can consider holding your wedding in your home or back garden. Of course, hiring a venue means you are paying for convenience and simplicity. Otherwise, you’ve got to be very aware of health and safety when setting up, and will need a lot of support before, and on, the day.
Officiant
You can avoid using the services of a professional, and get somebody else to prepare and read the ceremony. As a celebrant, I may be biased, and don’t recommend this! A celebrant will put together a wonderful ceremony based on your wishes and beliefs. They will also deliver it professionally and beautifully, as they are experienced public speakers. Their presence will also afford you calm and peace of mind, which are so valuable at a stressful time.
Extras
Do you really need that owl bringing the rings to the bridegroom? Bear in mind, if you’re trying to save money, what is dispensable and take into consideration what is essential to you.
Catering
If it’s a very small do, you can get away with buying in, laying out, serving, and washing up/disposing of the food and drink, not to mention the crockery, serviettes and cutlery yourself. You’ll have to make sure that special requests (eg vegetarians, gluten-free, children’s food) are looked after. Are you sure the saving here is worthwhile?
Entertainment
You can certainly save money by skipping the entertainment altogether, or by keeping it amateur. If you go for a reception, then be aware that not everybody will like what you offer. (The grannies and grandpas may not like a disco, for example.)
Photographers/Videographers
I think it’s a false economy to do without a professional photographer and/or videographer. You’re going to want tangible memories of your big day, and they need to be of high quality. You may know someone who’s a dab hand at photography and will do it for you. It does mean that they will not be able to enjoy the day properly and – even worse – if they stuff up, then your friendship may risk being sacrificed.
The list could go on! But I hope it gives you something to start on, as you plan your big day – and, if you decide to use a civil celebrant, please have a chat with me!
